I recently had a conversation with a young man I am acquainted with. I asked David how his wife and kids were doing and he indicated to me that he and his wife were separated and considering divorce. I told him that I was sorry to hear that and I would definitely keep them in my prayers.
He asked me what I thought he should do. I have known David and his wife for about six months and they have been the objects of considerable prayer in my life as I have been praying for the Lord to touch their lives so that they might come to the full realization of Christ working in their lives, and find his grace. I was very disappointed by his announcement to me and asked him if I could share some of God’s Word with him. I read to him the following passage.
A good woman is hard to find, and worth far more than diamonds.
Her husband trusts her without reserve, and never has reason to regret it.
Never spiteful, she treats him generously all her life long.
She shops around for the best yarns and cottons, and enjoys knitting and sewing.
She’s like a trading ship that sails to faraway places and brings back exotic surprises.
She’s up before dawn, preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day.
She looks over a field and buys it, then, with money she’s put aside, plants a garden.
First thing in the morning, she dresses for work, rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started.
She senses the worth of her work, is in no hurry to call it quits for the day.
She’s skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in homemaking.
She’s quick to assist anyone in need, reaches out to help the poor.
She doesn’t worry about her family when it snows; their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear. She makes her own clothing, and dresses in colorful linens and silks.
Her husband is greatly respected when he deliberates with the city fathers.
She designs gowns and sells them, brings the sweaters she knits to the dress shops.
Her clothes are well-made and elegant, and she always faces tomorrow with a smile.
When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say, and she always says it kindly.
She keeps an eye on everyone in her household, and keeps them all busy and productive.
Her children respect and bless her; her husband joins in with words of praise:
“Many women have done wonderful things, but you’ve outclassed them all!”
Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades. The woman to be admired and praised is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God. Give her everything she deserves! Festoon her life with praises!
I explained to David that this is the woman who God had made his wife to be, it is innate for these characteristics to be inside of a mother and wife. However, much of the responsibility for the development of a young girl that is married into a mature godly woman rests on the head of her husband as God has given him a charge to love his wife as Christ loves the church. Loving your wife as Christ loves the church I explained means laying down everything for that love, even your life, your own wants and desires.
I told David when you see your wife; you need to see her as the woman depicted in Proverbs 31. Look at her with love and think of her with praise and watch what God can do in your life. I explained further, “When she looks at you, she need to see a man who is guided by love for her, that love that places her first and above all friends and circumstances as you lay down everything for her, giving her a pure love, unselfish, motivated by her well-being above that of your own”. I explained that if He would make God the center of His life and marriage, I believed that God would work a miracle in their lives and that the Spirit of God would begin a work of love in their hearts and repair that hurt and pain a replace it with a new future as God’s grace began to work in their lives. I asked him to call her and ask her to meet with him so he could share the scripture with her.
I met with David yesterday, and as I walked up to him, I could see a new person as his smile was beaming from ear to ear. D he said “it worked, it worked”. He went on to tell me that they had gotten together the previous evening and he had read the scripture to her and explained that she was the woman that he saw in Proverbs 31. He went on to tell her that he was going to be a new man, responsible and loving, as he attempted to let go of the things that had brought them to this disaster in their lives and let God intervene with His grace to begin to heal and mend their broken hearts. Their discussion went on into the night where they found themselves in a 3 hour-long bubble bath where the love of God began to open their heart and they openly shared every instance in their marriage that had led to them being separated and in danger of divorce.
As the Spirit of God began to work in their hearts, they openly shared with one another for the very first time every each other’s failings and all the wrongs that each had done to the other, truthfully and in detail. As grace took hold they wept and wept as the love of God began to heal their hearts. At the end of the night, they made a new commitment to one another and each asked the other to take their spouse’s cell phone and erase every number of every person had that had caused much pain in their lives. They agreed to get new phone numbers and to break of all ties with people that had come between them and had them on the brink of divorce.
They are now back together, learning to love one another in a new way, with Christ the center of their marriage, with grace as their common bond that cannot be broken. What a wonderful hope they now have in Christ and in the power of His love.
Such is the power of God’s Word. Such is the power of God’s love. Such is the power of Grace demonstrated in Christ’s love as He lay down His life for you and me. Let that love become alive in your life and your marriage, as we find His grace in the most peculiar places and circumstances.